Relationships are complicated, especially in the current post-COVID world. You might be wondering how you will meet your future mate at this rate, and how you'll be able to find quality in this isolated desperate world. Well, the answer is simple. You're not going to with that attitude.
I implore you to use this time wisely. Think of attracting a mate like the process of grocery shopping. We've all gone to the store hungry and come home with absolute garbage and unnecessary items. Alternatively, when you go grocery shopping with a precise list, you are satisfied. Now apply this method to dating. When you go out into the world hungry without a clear intention, you will attract a lot of mismatched potential partners (notice how I avoided using garbage, wasn't ready to offend anyone just yet). Instead, if you set an intention and create a definitive list of standards, you'll get what you want and more.
To create a definitive partner grocery list, you have to first understand yourself. The more you invest in yourself, your experience will go from grocery shopping at the nearest dingy convenience store vs Whole Foods. A completely different ball game. If you haven't read our post on self-care yet do so to get up to speed on how to care for yourself.
Once you've set yourself up, we can get started on your partner list. It's time to grab a piece of paper, or the notes section on your phone is perfect. Now divide the page into three parts non-negotiables, wants, and triggers.
The non-negotiables are straight forward. What qualities do they have to have to be in a relationship with you? Make sure that you use positive phrasing. If you put what you don't want on paper, the universe can't differentiate and will deliver the opposite. Here are a few examples of non-negotiables for our team.
wants are simple. What do you want in a partner? This is your list, you get to be as specific as you wish. Trust that no one will see this list unless you show them. Here's a few examples of our wants:
The final section is the triggers. What are the trigger points that compliment your needs? For example, if you have a demanding career that requires you to attend a lot of public events, an outgoing partner will help you.
Trigger Social Events - Solution Extraverted
Trigger Emotional Baggage - Emotional Awareness
Trigger Cultural Traditions - Worldly
Trigger Family Pressure - Family Oriented
Once you have made your list and checked it twice, it's time to make it cringe-worthy. We've found tremendous success when you make a recording of your ideal list and listen to it every day. This will prime your mind to subconsciously be ready to attract your perfect mate. Now you've set your standards, expect that the universe will deliver.